Nabar

Holy cow that's strong. 

 

My exact words after picking up a sloshie on the way home. It is, after all, my Friday. 

 

Intentions were to pick up a margarita sloshie. No margarita's today. However Mai Tai was available. If you know me you know I've never enjoyed a Mai Tai. 

 

I'm no longer a Mai Tai virgin. 

 

I was sloshed after a few sips. Maybe. 

 

My long luscious hair is flowing gently in the breeze, skin beautifully flushed, not one care to be given. 

 

In my mind. 

 

I always ask, after imbibing, approximately four times per year at this point, "Why don't I drink more often?"

 

My eyes are crossed, as I type. 

 

Where's my dog? And my cat? George, George W, where are you?

 

Meow. 

 

One more week on 'A' crutch, one crutch, hopefully. I find out Wednesday. 

 

There are actual stories from this week that would make you laugh, make you say WTH, make you question my sanity, probably not for the first time. I tell ya what, it may be best to hold off on those stories until I'm sober. Let me think about them a bit. 

 

Just one, one story...

 

Him:

 

Why do you need to travel to Turkey to speak Turkish?

 

Me:

 

Because I'm uncertain how to phonetically pronounce Turkish. I'm accustomed to phonetics. Turkish doesn't rely heavily on phonetics it seems. 

 

Him:

 

Why didn't I have to travel to Turkey to speak Turkish?

 

Me: Because you're smarter than me.

 

Just know, the last nine years of my life have been the absolute best years of my life.

 

Aside from the births of my kids.

 

Goes without saying.

 

But someone will be a judgmental bitch if I don't preface this statement. You know who you are. 

 

I'll proofread this later. When I'm sober. And I'll still miss mistakes.

 

Whatever. 

 

Yes, I'm blitzed, but I'm okay. 

 

Only cost me eight dollars. 

 

(No, I'm not on my balcony naked. Yet.)