MRS Headline News
Schnauzer owner received her first Yeti item, courtesy of a man with whom schnauzer is slightly acquainted. Human’s new to-go cup will soon be filled with coffee. Or water, maybe a sloshie.
The same Good Samaritan reportedly provided ribs for Karen, um, Mom, seeing as she wasn’t able to purchase ribs from Hoback VFD, due to short-sighted preparation by brave, handsome firefighters. To the casual observer, said ribs were delicious. I wouldn’t know as Karen is a greedy piglet.
In other news, it’s hazy and hot in Wyoming. Something’s burning somewhere, air quality is poor this evening. Walks for schnauzers are discouraged, as are handshakes, doggy hi-fives, sniffing your neighbor dog, barking, snuggling, belly rubs, exchanging pleasantries, and bonding.
BREAKING NEWS: Rebel Schnauzer owner reportedly seen hugging, bonding, and shaking hands with random strangers. MRS News has not independently confirmed alleged blatant disregard for Tiny Pete mandates. Also not confirmed is reported Rebel Schnauzer owner ripping off her camo mask, yelling 2020 all you mother-2020ing 2020holes. (Translation currently unavailable.)
Thank you for tuning in to MRS News, unafraid, sometimes fair, and slightly off balance.
(MRS — Maggie Rose Shaw) 🐾
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